@ sushi w/ the fam tonite
and we were on the topic of my brother’s little girlfriend. (my brother just got home for thxgvng).
we pulled up a pic of them on his iphone, and my mom said something about him looking sleepy.
brother: That’s cuz we just woke up.
mom: woke up from what? WHAT??!?!
me: mom, i’m sure they were just waking up from a nap or something.
brother: no. we just woke up.
me: DUDE. TAKE THE FUCKING OUT WHEN I GIVE IT TO YOU.
mom: oh my GOD! No grandchildren yet!
brother: don’t worry, there’s protection.
me: STOP. TALKING. NOW. YOU WOKE UP FROM A NAP. THE END.
mom looked horrified, dad was laughing.
——-
as far as my parents need to know, i’m still a virgin.
