melissa / mayhem

my waste of time place. LA kid. red lips and cinderella hips. believe the hype...

melissamayhem at gmail dotcom

burning questions?

i have another NSFW blog too. Inquire Within...
Feel the rhythm, feel the rhyme. Get on up….

Feel the rhythm, feel the rhyme. Get on up….

Found this in the bathroom. Makes total sense.

Found this in the bathroom. Makes total sense.

I would like someone to do this for me but without the whole serial killer vibe to it.

I would like someone to do this for me but without the whole serial killer vibe to it.

Another crazy throwback !

Another crazy throwback !

I haz emoji needs for puffy shirts.  

—-

Cannot wait @seinfeld2000

I haz emoji needs for puffy shirts. —- Cannot wait @seinfeld2000

melissamayhem:

ONE MORE TIME, WITH FEELING.
doing a thing for Angry Hour at La Cita on Friday 8/1.  I’m not graduating anything, but I will have passed my class to transfer, now…unforch not Fall as intended but Winter….AND having moved outta my BS roommie sitch.
IT’S A CELEBRATION, BITCHES.  Plz feel free to come, enjoy, and bring as many degenerate friends as you’d like.

one more, one more time.

melissamayhem:

ONE MORE TIME, WITH FEELING.

doing a thing for Angry Hour at La Cita on Friday 8/1.  I’m not graduating anything, but I will have passed my class to transfer, now…unforch not Fall as intended but Winter….AND having moved outta my BS roommie sitch.

IT’S A CELEBRATION, BITCHES.  Plz feel free to come, enjoy, and bring as many degenerate friends as you’d like.

one more, one more time.

fuck to YOU, roommie.  i’m gonna be weird like you and take a roll of TP into the bathroom back & forth upon every use.  YES REALLY.  THIS IS HAPPENING. 
THIS. is. happening.  in my life.  in my [early] 30s no less.  She is withholding TP.  This is next level insanity.  Talk about weird shit, amirite?  (also, puns are NOT intended for any use of the word ‘shit’)
i keep thinking it can’t get any weirder and then it’s like, “WELL, touche, my friend.”  tip o’ the hat to you for being the…..i don’t even know……most annoying? randomly petty? not actually my worst roommate, which is saying A LOT….?  what.  what do we do here. 
my bed will be out on thursday.  i can tell she will try to fuck me on the security deposit like a dirty pirate whore with a syphilitic vagina, but, meh.  78% of my packing has been picking up stuff of the floor and taking it mere blocks away in small increments.  could be worse. 
anyway.  TP.  Don’t know what you’ve got till its gone.

fuck to YOU, roommie.  i’m gonna be weird like you and take a roll of TP into the bathroom back & forth upon every use.  YES REALLY.  THIS IS HAPPENING. 

THIS. is. happening.  in my life.  in my [early] 30s no less.  She is withholding TP.  This is next level insanity.  Talk about weird shit, amirite?  (also, puns are NOT intended for any use of the word ‘shit’)

i keep thinking it can’t get any weirder and then it’s like, “WELL, touche, my friend.”  tip o’ the hat to you for being the…..i don’t even know……most annoying? randomly petty? not actually my worst roommate, which is saying A LOT….?  what.  what do we do here. 

my bed will be out on thursday.  i can tell she will try to fuck me on the security deposit like a dirty pirate whore with a syphilitic vagina, but, meh.  78% of my packing has been picking up stuff of the floor and taking it mere blocks away in small increments.  could be worse. 

anyway.  TP.  Don’t know what you’ve got till its gone.

The shit has hit the fan. Pretty sure my roommate is holding all of the TP hostage.

laineydiemond:

everyone is george

Still my Summer of George, currently

laineydiemond:

everyone is george

Still my Summer of George, currently

(Source: yoloswag3000)

for what

for what

Meaning of life.

Meaning of life.